Sunday, May 27, 2012
Monday, May 7, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Pet Stores
So we had a little family night tonight and ended up at one of the big chain pet stores as we usually do on our family outings. This time was different though.
Typically I can resist the urge to buy every pet at the pet stores because those pets are sad, pathetic and usually limited to fish, ferrets and rats. Not today. No sir. Today there was this bird, this Green Cheeked Conure, (Conure is apparently fancy talk for Parakeet) and she was absolutely charming.
Homie roused me from my interest in the ferrets by yelling - "Look, she waves at me!" I look over to see him fully captivated by this glorious looking bird. Sure as shit, this bird would wave back at him every time he waved at it.
We probably stared at this bird for a good 20 minutes before regretfully leaving without it (kid was in tears). When we get home, both homie and I are independently searching the internet for info on this bird.
The photos I have come across are enough to seal this deal for me. I need this bird after seeing these photos:
"Hey guy!"
"A little to the left, please."
"Not THIS body.."
I just really liked this photo.
Bird 1: "Look, I told him it was only noon.."
Bird 2: *Hiccup*
If you have ever read this blog before or actually know me, you know that I am kind of strange (I suppose) and to see a bird that likes to chill on its back was right up my alley.
So today I learned a few things about myself. 1) I really want a Green Cheeked Conure
2) I am really bad at coming up with captions.
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Who Do You Prefer?
Whose version do you prefer?
OR...
In no way has beer influenced this question.
O.K., I lied. Beer influenced this question last night but I passed out. Also, I started kind of early tonight.
In no way has beer influenced this question.
O.K., I lied. Beer influenced this question last night but I passed out. Also, I started kind of early tonight.
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Lobster Christ
I jumped the gun on posting what we will now refer to as Lobster Christ. A back story about this grand lobster is necessary to truly appreciate it in all it's saviorly glory.
Everything started when nearly a year ago we discovered the best Mexican restaurant in the area, Jessy's. They have unbelievable food and if you live in Norfolk, Va - go eat there. It's in OV. We aren't here to discuss the food though. We are here for this guy:
Everything started when nearly a year ago we discovered the best Mexican restaurant in the area, Jessy's. They have unbelievable food and if you live in Norfolk, Va - go eat there. It's in OV. We aren't here to discuss the food though. We are here for this guy:
He used to hang on the wall at Jessy's & I would always make sure to grab the booth with the best view of my Lobster Christ. I even made my FB profile picture this photo of my love. I quickly became obsessed. Well I say he used to hang on the wall because when we went yesterday he wasn't there.
Naturally, I got pretty nervous so me and homie started joking about what could have happened to Him. He jokingly suggested that it had just been sold to some inquiring customer at an obscenely low price. To me Lobster Christ is priceless so the thought of this causes nervous laughter on my part.
Not able to handle the what-ifs any longer, I ask the waiter/counter guy/manager (?) what the hell happened to the lobster? You will never guess what happened..
Lobster Christ was just sold to an inquiring customer at an obscenely low price. They are re-vamping the place and he didn't think the lobster fit in anymore so he took it down. Someone had just come in not long before, asked about the lobster as well & bought it. My heart shattered. I was seriously depressed by the time the food came and probably for the rest of the day, explaining the next tattoo I plan on getting:
R.I.P. Lobster Christ
?-2012
Saturday, March 17, 2012
Took The Cat For Another Walk
My daughter found this walk hysterical & can be heard cackling. After I (accidently) stopped recording, the cat took off across the street towards the house. A car full of very amused older women pulled up gushing and asking questions. These walks are never dull.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Here We Go Again
I don't know if she realizes how funny she is:
"I became buds with the neighbor dog and now he keeps escaping his fence to sit on my porch. </3" - veganviking
Took The Cat For A Walk
I was in a really bad mood a few weeks ago so we took the cat for a walk. I definitely laughed a lot.
Oh - she is obsessed with going outside since this walk. Today she scratched on the glass front door & cried for about 23 minutes straight.
I Am Trusting You Here..
Have you ever said that to somebody?
If you haven't but feel the urge to, at any point in your life, I'd recommend shutting the fuck up, scrapping whatever that idea was and finding yourself a new game plan.
</3
If you haven't but feel the urge to, at any point in your life, I'd recommend shutting the fuck up, scrapping whatever that idea was and finding yourself a new game plan.
</3
Saturday, March 10, 2012
Beer Makes Me Honest
Not really but anybody with courage issues knows it "helps".
I'm not O.K. with.... this. I'm ten seconds too late in knowing I shouldn't say this or that pertaining to what has been on my mind but so fucking what? The ability to "conveniently" send thoughts instantly ruins any chance of me biting my tongue & waiting for a more appropriate time to say what I need to say.
How is that for vague and annoying?
I'm not O.K. with.... this. I'm ten seconds too late in knowing I shouldn't say this or that pertaining to what has been on my mind but so fucking what? The ability to "conveniently" send thoughts instantly ruins any chance of me biting my tongue & waiting for a more appropriate time to say what I need to say.
How is that for vague and annoying?
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
What Time Zone Is The Caribbean?
..is what I asked after some delicious lunch from Higher Heights, the local & completely dank Caribbean food place down the street. I figured if it was at least 5 P.M. there that somehow that would justify my absolute "need" for a beer at 1:48 P.M. on a Wednesday afternoon.
On a probably related note, guess who is "interesting" at a completely inappropriate time of day?
On a probably related note, guess who is "interesting" at a completely inappropriate time of day?
Friday, January 27, 2012
Beer Makes Me Drunk
The following has had me laughing for approx. 13 minutes and counting:
"Does anyone else buy snuggle fabric softener just because of that weird bear?" - lauracroft83
"Does anyone else buy snuggle fabric softener just because of that weird bear?" - lauracroft83
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Holy Cow
Perhaps next time I should remember that I don't just tweet when making bad substance decisions.
So glad this blog was here to remind me, two days later.
So glad this blog was here to remind me, two days later.
Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Fuuuuuuck Ewe!
Do NOT mix Tylenol PM & dank-ass beer.
Do you hear me?? I'm being fucking serious. As you can see - my appropriate language (and/or meter that determines acceptable period of time between curse-words) meter is in a state of complete fuckery and I just need to warn you to not do what I said before.
I leave you with this....
Do you hear me?? I'm being fucking serious. As you can see - my appropriate language (and/or meter that determines acceptable period of time between curse-words) meter is in a state of complete fuckery and I just need to warn you to not do what I said before.
I leave you with this....
Saturday, January 14, 2012
Moar
"If I suddenly grew a penis I'd freak out hard for about five minutes before I started sticking it in things around the house." - @snowness
"Squirrel Jam would be a cool name for a squirrel band and/or a really sketchy condiment." - @Hadzilla
This one is a pact between @Tribanator & myself.
Saturday, January 7, 2012
What Do You Mean Ducks Don't Party??
I just drew a duck.... drinking.... making a "drunk sorority girl face".
Monday, January 2, 2012
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